Before Midnight: My Thoughts and Realizations

“Like sunlight, sunset, we appear, we disappear. We are so important to some, but we are just passing through...”

A little secret I need to confess. I actually saw this movie two times in the cinemas. One was with one of my officemates, Ros, and the second time was with K (the guy I’m currently dating). And honestly, if one of my friends dragged me into watching the movie again, I will willingly go and watch the movie all over again. It was money well spent.

Honestly, I don’t know if I’d be disappointed or glad over the fact that only a few people watched the movie. Maybe, glad because I was able to get good seats (watching at an SM Cinema hence the free seating) or disappointed because people did not know about the movie. I guess only the ones who really followed through the Before Sunrise and Before Sunset movies were the only ones who knew about this so, I guess, not a lot of Filipinos know about them. That’s just sad.

I consider Before Sunrise to be the most romantic of the three movies; Before Sunset to be the most emotional and moving; and Before Midnight to be the most realistic. I consider Before Midnight as the epitome of a real life relationship. Here is why:

The movie focused more on showing how even the best looking relationships can be jolted by arguments and misunderstandings at times; and how, sometimes, love isn’t enough to sustain a relationship no matter how long you have been with each other or no matter how good you know your partner is. While watching the movie, I was put in a position wherein I just can’t figure out whose opinion am I leaning on.

I am a woman and I fully understand why Celine was acting all nuts and crazy and just plain paranoid. I understand why she came up with overly assessed projections and why a woman would just drop words like that. I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND. If you have been single your whole life, you may not be able to comprehend Celine’s attitude, her thoughts and her doubts.

But on a third person perspective, you cannot help but just feel bad for Jesse. True enough, although I do understand Celine’s point-of-view, her assumptions and her attitude in arguing with Jesse just seems plain shallow and downright crazy. As Jesse said it, “You are the fucking mayor of crazy town!” And because I felt connected with the way Celine pushes on her thoughts and her arguments, I just can’t help but wonder – Do I sound that ridiculous when I question my ex’s? Yes, I have become a teeny bit paranoid.

You see, women over-projects when they need security; and men just say what they mean, what they can initially think of without giving any second thoughts whether it will be appropriate or not for the situation; which leads us to the point at hand – No couple can ever be perfect because as a man and a woman, we are all imperfect in different ways. And I believe that this movie sends out a message to all the couples out there – HOLD ON.

Life is not perfect and being in a relationship is, definitely, not a bed of roses. Sure, it is all fun and sweet in the beginning – it always is. But through the whole course of the relationship, you would soon realize that you may not be able to agree on everything and that, sometimes, we can just grow tired of dealing with the same old shits over and over again. What will you do about it? Would you just give up and end the climax once and for all? As Celine said it, “This is how relationships start falling apart.” But in my own point-of-view it only falls apart when we let it.

Love and relationship are very complex issues. It’s not as easy as how romantic comedy movies or fairytales depict it to be. Don’t give up just yet and don’t walk away. Things will never be smooth sailing and you may feel like you’re falling out of love but remember what Jesse said: “You remember that guy who loved you and you had that great romance with? It's me.” Change is inevitable but love will only grow until such time when one has finally decided to give way, give up and forget.