Let’s face it. No matter which era you belong to, dating will never be easy. There are those who call themselves the “experts,” but how do we really define being a dating expert to be like? Can you be an expert if you’ve found love easily? Can you be an expert if you have never been hurt? Can you be an expert if you can juggle more than one partner at a time? Can you be an expert if you can get laid anytime you want? Truth be told, no one can ever really be an expert because dating is and never will be a game you can practice until you perfect it. Dating is complex whether you’re a player or you’re in it for the real thing.
When I was single, all I really wanted was to find my one true love and I don’t mind kissing a lot of frogs until I find the prince amongst them. It was never easy for me growing up as a not typically attractive girl. I actually even thought that you can teach your heart to fall in love with the person who already loves you and be happy in the end. Some people may say that it worked for them but it sure as hell did not work that way for me. That is why I never liked idea of waiting for a guy to ask me out and just choosing amongst those who had the courage to do so. It’s so suffocating. I feel like I don’t have the freedom to choose who I want to be with. I called BS on being an overly conservative girl. I will never be that girl.
As I was growing older, I learned that there is absolutely nothing wrong with asking a guy out on a date if you find him interesting. As a matter of fact, there are actually guys who would never open up unless you initiate something. Case in point, my fiancé.
I liked him as a friend so I told myself, “why not ask him if he’d like to hangout?” And so I did. We had coffee, dinner, and some karaoke on our first date. It turned out well because after that, we became closer and before I knew it he finally asked to kiss me one night. See? It worked for me so why would it be impossible to work for others?
|Dress: SM Surplus | Cardigan: Cotton On | Shoes: Payless|
As much as I do not believe in calling people “dating experts,” some of my friends do think I’m one. Some of them ask me for advice on what to do in this situation, or that, or whatever, and some actually even ask me for relationship advice! When I give people advice though, I only have one thing in mind… Remember that every person is different and you can NEVER COMPARE TWO PEOPLE AS IF THE OTHER WILL REACT THE WAY THE OTHER PERSON DID so make sure you give options but never give an ultimate solution to a friend’s problem when it comes to relationships. Especially at this day and age, we millennials, are pretty complex. Some of us tend to oversimplify or overcomplicate things. In short, never assume until proven true. So if you’re having problems with someone or you want to know the truth like if he or she likes you… Just ask. If things get too complicated for you to handle or comprehend, leave if it’s not worth it anymore. Only you can know what you’re worth of.
Dating differs with every person. Don’t assume. Don’t generalize. Just be yourself. Don’t be a player and don’t join the game.